Date: 5th May 2011 at 1:21pm
Written by:

Cristiano Ronaldo

CR7 shows off his superman quiff

When Cristiano Ronaldo made his £80 million move to Real Madrid, most pundits had their say.

It was the start of the end of Manchester United with us selling our best player and probably the best player in the world at the time. It was also meant to be the start of the Real Madrid revival. With Ronaldo and Kaka joining, they were surely going to overthrow Barcelona as not only the best team in Spain, but probably the best team in the world.

Fast forward two years and things have not worked out how many had predicted. Manchester United are still a force to be reckoned with, both in the Premier League and in Europe. Antonio Valencia and Nani have both stepped up to the plate to fill the gap left by Ronaldo and younger players such as Rafael, Fabio, Smalling and Hernandez are starting to show their worth to United.

Real Madrid, on the other hand, have not done as well as most predicted. Still lagging behind Barcelona in the league and being out played by them in Europe. Their only success in the two years has been a Copa del Ray, which perhaps fittingly, was dropped under a bus.

Also, Lionel Messi, the second best player in the world (After Gareth Bale of course), has found another gear. His performances have really put Ronaldo in the shade over the past couple of years.

So, what I am trying to say is, come home Ronnie.

It would probably cost in the region of £75 million to bring him back (if they are willing to sell of course) Even the most optimistic fans would agree that we will probably won’t have more than around the £40 million mark to spend in the summer. So where can we find the missing £35 million from?

Tomasz Kuszczak looks like he is leaving. We should get £5 million for him. £45 million.

Dimitar Berbatov’s position in the team has been taken by The Little Pea. Many are tipping him to leave this summer. He is only 30 years old and is currently the Premierships leading scorer. We should get at least £10 million for him. £55 million.

Rumour has it, Osama Bin Laden was killed by a wayward Darron Gibson long range shot in training. The FBI had a £15 million reward on the head of Bin Laden. No doubt the Glazers are already in touch with them. £70 million.

We could also sell Darron Gibson. For a player of Gibson’s quality and ability, we should be looking at around the 50p mark. £70,000,000.50

Lastly, I am offering to sell my Mum. She can cook a quality Cottage Pie, is world class with a hoover and makes a quality cup of tea. Surely we could get £5 million from City for her. £75,000,000.50

So there we have it. We could afford Ronaldo, the majority of fans would love him back and I have a feeling Ronaldo would love to come back home.

Viva Ronaldo.



70 responses to “Time For Cristiano Ronaldo To Come ‘Home’”

  1. The Mancunian says:

    That was clasic about selling your mum,brilliant!! as a man have not morals when it comes to football, ha ha ha , well done i,m still chucklin here,,

  2. Seif says:

    Manchester dont need a player like ronaldo,ronaldo is a player that wants whats good for him and not whats good for the team he always wants to score goal and none for his team mates he takes all free kicks and penalties and wants every thing for hiself

    • @stockportred says:

      Ronaldo was/is the best beater of lesser teams going. With him we would have beaten Wolves, Newcastle, Villa ect…

    • caron says:

      correction….you are wrong. Ronaldo left man u because of roonye;s jealousy. rooney never liked cr7 because cr7 had all the lime light and it wasnt shining on roonye.So, please dont talk rubbish and blame cr7. Why must he get all the fluck from your people. Put the blame where it belongs. You dont like cr7 is one thing but to blame him for that has happened.Cr7 would have left if he was appreciated by the british. Instead they gave a hard time. I remember when they would boooooo him on the pitch. He took it for so long and finaly he had no choice.

  3. Rob B says:

    Personally, Im not interested in Ronaldo ‘coming home’…he is history. A former great player for us. Hes never coming back. I dont get how some MUFC fans still hanker after him. Yet here you all are, crapping all over Darron Gibson after he scored and assisted a goal in a Champions League semi final

    A lot of you need to find out where your priorities are…

    And that should be solely with the club and the players who currentlt wear our shirt.

    (and anyone who calls us Man U – You dont support the same club as all of us. Idiots)

    • Justin Mottershead says:

      I’ve had this debate with Reds over the past few months. Just because someone calls United ‘Man U’ doesn’t mean they’re not a true fan and certainly doesn’t make them idiots.

      Here’s a section from an article I wrote earlier on in the season about debunking Man United ‘myths.’

      1. “Man U” is an insulting term for United with Munich connotations. For whatever reason, in recent years the idea that referring to United as Man U has something to do with insulting us over Munich has gathered momentum. There’s been one too many misinformed United fans claiming that people who use the term are trying to use it derogatorily.

      Some of this stems from the fact that some rival fans call United ManUre in a p*ss poor attempt at humour via a bit of divergent spelling. This is totally different from the term Man U however which is actually used by some United fans. Just recently Danny Simpson tweeted how upon Neville’s retirement he was grateful for the help he’d given him during his time at ‘Man U.’ Was Simpson raising the specter of Munich with an evil tweet? No. He , like many others has probably never heard of the Man U myth and a myth is exactly what it is.

      Tom Clare author of the superb book ‘Forever a Babe Growing up with Manchester United’ explains the origins of the two different terms as merely a product of slightly lazy journalism when reporters had to be as succinct as possible with every story they filed.

      To quote Clare: “Even Big Ron used the term ‘Man U’ when he was manager of United” Now Atkinson may be prone to the odd bit of foot in his mouth, but he was hardly likely to be desecrating the memory of the Munich victims every time he spoke about his employers.

      Check out Clare’s full explanation:

      • shadya says:


    • caron says:

      ronaldo would come back if rooney wasnt such a horrible person. Rooney was the one who made ronalso leave . There was a lot of jealousy going on there. Rooney wanted the lime light and Cr7 had it.Now rooney has it and he doesnt want cr7 back because that would eman giving it up . He is enjoying it too much.I can see it of his face.Cr7 would have done so much more at man u.So, dont blame cr7 for leaving all to do with rooney.

  4. pete says:

    Wow, got a bite. Cool. Yes, I have anger management issues, yes, I need help. Hope that makes all you Man U. Fans feel better about yourselves. Lolol. Ffs, you missed my point by about a decade. Criticising our players in the manner you have shows a complete lack of understanding with regards to the Sir Alex way. Your arrogance knows no bounds. Silly little man.

    • @stockportred says:

      So people were wrong to critise players like Djemba Djemba, Dong, Manucho, ect…

      I dont understand. We are happy to say when we think players playing for other teams are rubbish. We should definatly say when we don’t think a United player is good enough.

      • pete says:

        Yes. Constructive criticism, an argument which is well articulated. NOT the 50p rubbish above. For Christ sake, if you want to use throwaway comments such as this, at least wait until the player you believe is so inadequate makes his inevitable departure from the club. Whilst they are still pulling our top over their heads on match day, show some respect.

  5. BRAIN says:

    Ronnie will come back some day. what does he signed a six year deal he has know four years left . so i reckon two years left in his contract or even 3 next season . Ronnie was great player at this wonderful club 42 goals that famous season . Gibson is no good plays well on and of Bin laden that is a good one mate .

  6. lununcle says:

    I honestly don’t think Ronaldo will come back…this just won’t happen….of course it will be good for United if he comes back….but Man U needs an attacking midfield more urgently than a winger…

  7. Chris Smith says:

    At the moment Ronnie is carrying Real Madrid, the stats do not lie. If he was backed with the talent that Messi has at Argentina or Barca, we wouldn’t be talking about a contest here.

    In the end, he is still the greatest of our generation – let’s pray that he comes back home to Manchester.

    • lamar says:

      slow down partner. argentina as a team sucks. you can watch the world cup replays if you dont believe me

  8. caron says:

    I dare this person above saying that he cannot beat d b. That is a lot of rubbish he has already beaten all players. So, dont come and talk rubbish on this site. He is the best in the world I dont care what you people say. That dwarf is nothing but a cheat, together with his mates.Just you lot leave him alone. I read once that the reason he wanted to leave England is that apparently him and his family had been abused by some people there over the years.I want him back at man u, but, if this the case I doubt it that he will come back to man u. It is a very big petty.