Date: 15th December 2011 at 12:00pm
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"Side by side by my piano, keyboard oh lord why don't we!"

"Side by side by my piano, keyboard oh lord why don't we!"

The are set to order Luis Suarez and Patrice Evra to perform a version of the Stevie Wonder-Paul McCartney classic “Ebony and Ivory” in a bid to put an end to the ongoing race row.

Imaginary sources not obtained via phone hacking revealed: “The that Evra and Suarez performing such a moving and bridge building song together will not only help both sets of players move on, but hopefully eradicate from all walks of life as it did in the 80s.”

Ever since the infamous incident at Anfield, where Evra was allegedly called a racial slur by the striker, the has taken its time to properly investigate the case and come up with a viable punishment/solution.

Both and have been disappointed by the length of time the have taken to address the matter and the decision could prove somewhat controversial.

Paul McCartney who wrote the song, is apparently unimpressed with the FA’s suggestion and demanded at least 102% of all record sales.

Liverpool boss Daglish reportedly commented: “We’ll support Luis in any songs he sings and will try our best to get him that all-important Brit nomination.”

Gus Poyet added: “Luis would sing that song beautifully.”

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