The FA are set to order Luis Suarez and Patrice Evra to perform a version of the Stevie Wonder-Paul McCartney classic “Ebony and Ivory” in a bid to put an end to the ongoing race row.
Imaginary sources not obtained via phone hacking revealed: “The FA believe that Evra and Suarez performing such a moving and bridge building song together will not only help both sets of players move on, but hopefully eradicate racism from all walks of life as it did in the 80s.”
Ever since the infamous incident at Anfield, where Evra was allegedly called a racial slur by the Liverpool striker, the FA has taken its time to properly investigate the case and come up with a viable punishment/solution.
Paul McCartney who wrote the song, is apparently unimpressed with the FA’s suggestion and demanded at least 102% of all record sales.
Liverpool boss Kenny Daglish reportedly commented: “We’ll support Luis in any songs he sings and will try our best to get him that all-important Brit nomination.”
Gus Poyet added: “Luis would sing that song beautifully.”