Date: 24th October 2011 at 4:45pm
Written by:
Mario Balotelli

Many Reds were asking themselves this yesterday

I’m sure you’re all aware of the work of renowned American psychologist Elisabeth Kübler-Ross’s work, so I won’t insult your intelligence by repeating much of her biography.

For the few among you who haven’t had the time to read some of her writings recently, Kübler-Ross is probably best known for her work on NDE – near death experiences- as well as various other endeavours particularly in the field of out of body experiences.

As Edin Dzeko scored Manchester City’s sixth goal yesterday in the 93rd minute of the Manchester derby, it became obvious to me as I’m sure it did to most Reds, that I’d soon be turning to Kübler-Ross’s model ‘The Five Stages of Grief to help get over such a demoralising tragedy.

Here’s my own take of dealing with the derby defeat using Ross’s example:

Denial: This cannot be happening? Did it really happen? Surely that wasn’t City’s sixth goal? How many of us asked ourselves these questions yesterday?

Anger– What a disgrace! It’s not good enough! We’ve got far too many passengers! I’m gonna f*cking kill someone! Once the disbelief subsided, the urge to ram the nearest pint pot into a City fans face took hold, thankfully according to GMP reports, no one succumbed to their angry yearning.

Bargaining– Maybe if we win all our other games we’ll be okay. I’ll suffer this defeat if we win the league. I’d give anything to fast forward to the game at Eastlands, where I’m sure we’ll win. A deal with the devil for an Eastlands win, seemed more than a fair price to pay yesterday.

Depression– F*ck it, I’m off home to bed. I can’t be bothered with it all anymore. Football’s gone to the dogs, I’m not even hungry. We all felt those feelings yesterday, but not to worry, it’s all part of the grieving process.

Acceptance– It did happen, but so what we’re still champions, better off than we were this time last season, we’ve now played all the top teams so have an easy run. Titles are won in May not October. In Fergie we trust.

Yesterday was a nightmare, of that there can be no ‘denial’ but once the first four stages of grief had subsided, the fifth one helped a bit of ratinal perspective take hold. Yes, it was terrible, certain issues need to be addressed, but with one eye on his legacy I’m confident Sir Alex Ferguson isn’t about t0 let City become the dominant force in English football.

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2 responses to “The Five Stages of Grief: Coping With The 6-1 Derby Defeat”

  1. lamar says:

    I’m no longer that confident in sir alex

  2. ole says:

    Face it the only thing wrong on sunday was that it was the incorrect referee Howard Webb was mistakenly not given the game but only the fourth official. Had Webb been in charge of the game i am sure he would have found reason to give United at least two penalties and send off a minimum of two city players.
    This would have led to yet another home win to keep up the proud home record.
    Finally a woman goes to the doctor and says she has a problem with her vagina keeps singing glory glory Man United.
    The doc replies thats not a problem 70000 other cunts sing that every week at old trafford.(although only when you are winning)
    Will we now see the green and gold movement resurface a real wise idea with the debt the club are in.